Life presents us with several opportunities throughout the duration of our lives. Some people miss those opportunities because of some reason or another. The one reason that can be prevented exists within us. We need to open our eyes, and our minds, to all of the experiences that exist out there. We cannot close these doors before they are ever open, for we will miss some of the most wondrous things life has to offer.

Some of these opportunities may not be as obvious as others. Some may seem too risky, or crazy, to even attempt. Others may be right there in front of us, bright as day, and we never even notice them because we forget to look. Sometimes, we just need to stop thinking for a second, and just start doing. I know, we are taught that rational actions involve proper thought before acting. But, to achieve some types of happiness, you can get caught up in rational thought. One type of happiness is Love.

Maybe we would be protected from the dangers and risks involved with love if we just took a step back to rationally think about what it is we are doing and experiencing. Maybe it is completely irrational to put yourself in such a situation, to experience such high, to only set you up to the hard crash. Then again, most people experience the tragic lows of losing someone they love, and deal with the grief and sadness that follows. These highs and lows in life is what makes life what it is. It is these very things that allows us to live, and experience life to it's fullest; to feel and grow as we age.

What is life without love, or some form of it? Can one truly be happy without feeling love at all? Or would they just become cold and numb, and simply exist? Some people become too damaged from experiencing the loss of a loved one, or being hurt by someone they once loved, to trust anyone enough to leave themselves that vulnerable ever again. Their lives become a sad reality, one that they hate to live within. They hide deep within their emotional shell and hide from everyone, emotionally. By doing this, they are not only protecting themselves from further pain and suffering, they are preventing themselves from experiencing true joy and happiness anymore as well. 

The point I am trying to get at, and this goes beyond simply love, is that to truly experience life, you must be willing to experience all of the highs and the lows that it has to offer. You must be willing to take chances, and get outside of your comfort zone. 

In short, just live life without regrets. Sometimes make thoughtful decisions, and don't act on impulse. But on the same token, don't let your thoughts prevent you from doing something that could potentially make you, and those around you, very happy. Uncertainty isn't always a "bad thing" to feel. In fact, it can feel quite exciting at times. I will just share this last thought with you to help emphasize what I am trying to explain.

Time and time again, I have noticed this re-occurring theme. Whether it is in movies, or from what I have heard from friends and family, they have generally said the same thing. There was something that they had wished they had done when they were younger; they had some regret that they didn't live life the way that they wanted, or had hoped for. I believe that you can think about this in two ways.

The first way is that, yes, you can hold some level of regret or disappointment because life hasn't turned out the way you had hoped for. And maybe there was something that you could have done differently, something you could have changed to make your present existence "better". You can live everyday in the past, and just live the remainder of your days miserably. With thought process, though, you will be missing out on the present, and the life you could be living today. This is similar to when we are younger, we have this problem of always wishing we were older and grown up, and we tend to not enjoy today for what it is, precious. In both instances, we miss out on living.

The second way is to live in the present, and not have any regrets. This approach would make it almost impossible to have, or linger on, regret. You would just be focusing on the here and now, and what can be done to make each day as pleasant and enjoyable as you can. It becomes easier to enjoy the littler, and simpler things in life. You will be able to look back in the past and understand why you took certain actions, and why life turned out the way it did. You will, almost certainly, live a happier, and more fulfilling life this way.

Life is like a invisible river that we exist within. Either we can fight against these natural forces, or we can just go along for the ride. Sometimes, something will come along in our life that may not "fit" in our plans. This could be a surprising job opportunity, or the potential love of your life. The key is keeping your eyes open  to these opportunities, and potentially life-changing events, as well as being willing to take risks. Live your life everyday without regret, understanding that you made the best decision that you could given the circumstances. Few decisions or actions are really crazy or unreasonable once the context surrounding them is understood. Sometimes, you won't even be able to explain to someone else why you did what you did. 

Anyways, I will end this blog post, but I am certain that I will talk about this topic again in the future.

Peace and Love,
-Daryl Simons Jr.

While they do make a good point about fixing our mental health system, I don't think this provides a good enough of a basis for not implementing universal background checks. Even though they claim that the tragedies in Newton and Aurora could not have been prevented if background checks had been implemented, what about all of the cases in which violent criminals/or mentally unstable people legally purchase guns? Back home,a man murdered a bartender in her own home with a concealed pistol -- he did not have any prior violent offenses. Even with that said, he did not sound very mentally stable. If mental health checks of individuals were mandated prior to buying a gun, which could be enforced/included with background checks, that might reduce the levels of gun violence. There is no single solution for this problem.

To all who say that criminals don't obey laws, and that background checks (as well as any other gun laws)will only affect the law-abiding citizens, I will just say this. Using this logic, any laws that are implemented will only be obeyed by "good" citizens, so therefore, are not effective about preventing the very behaviors that the law was created in order to prevent. Under certain circumstances, I can definitely see this as being the case. Marijuana, for example, has been under prohibition, but has that stopped the use of it? Not at all. An all-out ban probably won't solve the gun issue, but regulations would surely help reduce the problem -- background checks, increased penalties on crimes involving guns (especially assault weapons), mental health checks, etc.

As for a ban on assault weapons,my argument for people saying that they need one for self-defense is simple.What average criminal is going to rob you or your house with an M16 or AK47? Considering the harsher penalties imposed upon criminals who use assault weapons vs. those who use non-assault weapons, I highly doubt that you will be robbed by someone carrying one. Or to those saying that you need it to defend yourself against a group of robbers, again, most robberies or muggings are going to consist of just a few people -- it wouldn't logically make sense to mug someone, or their house, with a big group of people; more chance to get caught, and less spoils to divide among each other. So, the only time that I see you being mugged, or attacked, against someone (or many individuals) carrying assault weapons is if you happen to be; a member of a gang, involved in some black-ops type operations, or just angered someone very powerful.

With all of this said, I believe that an all-of-the-above approach would be best suited to deal with this issue. Logical and ethical solutions should be implemented. Public safety/well-being should take precedent over individual joy/happiness when using an assault weapon. In reality, I feel like the NRA and many so-called 2nd Amendment supporters are more upset over the potential loss of fun involved with shootings these types of guns rather than their actual concern over self-defense -- no one is suggesting that pistols, shotguns, or rifles be banned; all of which are sufficiently suited to defend an individual against the vast majority of gun-toting/non-armed criminals. I am glad that mental health is beginning to be addressed again. Remember, Reagan was the one that heavily cut mental health programs in the 80s. Ironically, he was a patron saint of the NRA. Now the NRA is the one pushing to return these very programs.

-Daryl Simons Jr.

Whether it’s committing to be with someone, or choosing a career path, or even a long-term mortgage, making these decisions can be tough sometimes, especially when the direction you want to go in life is not so clear. So how do we make these decisions, and actually be happy with them?

I think it boils down to passion, even with the house (I mean in the sense you would be living in an area that you truly love). You shouldn't even be considering commitment to a person if you don't have passion with them. It is the same with a job/career. I mean, you can always force yourself to, without the passion. But, chances are that neither situation will work out, nor even if they did happen to work out, things wouldn't be that great and you wouldn't be all that happy.

If you are ever in a situation in which you are doing something that you aren't passionate about, or at least working up to doing something that you will be passionate about, I think it should be time that you sit down and re-evaluate what you are doing with your life. Our lives are not meant to be lived simply upon the basis of "living" and accumulating possessions -- that sounds like a nightmare.

You would be just living day to day, functioning no more than a zombie would. You wake up, brush your teeth and shower. Eat breakfast. Go to work. Put up with bullshit. Drive home. Eat. Do something. Sleep. And then it repeats all over again. This is not the formula for living happily.

I will say that if you are stuck working a job that sounds like that, having someone by your side that you feel passionate about can make life so much better -- give you a reason to live, and a sense of meaning in life. True, it might not fulfill this grand purpose of wanting to do something "great" in the world, but maybe our idea of doing something great doesn't have to be at a grand scale: just being that someone that makes another smile can be a great thing in-and-of itself.

So back to commitment, what is it, and why do we do it? Some people commit for good reasons -- they love someone, or they love something (job, hobby, etc). And others commit for the completely wrong reasons -- feel like they have to, societal pressures, impatience to wait for the right one (whatever the reason) -- you would know in your heart if you didn't commit to something for the right reason.

Commitment is a way that humans, we create a sense of stability in our lives. It’s a way that we focus much of our energy on one (or a few) things over an extended period of time. That is why it is scary, to some. We can feel trapped if we commit to a job or another individual. But, at the same time, it can feel like a new beginning, and provide us with a sense of purpose. Like when you get married, or have a kid -- these things can redefine your outlook on life, and who you are living it for.

When you love someone, or something, making a commitment to it is much easier than if you didn't -- that should be obvious. But some people never find that love, that passion for someone or something. These people often commit, though there are still some that do regardless of not finding that passion. Both instances (of not finding a passion) are very depressing, and I could only imagine that it would make your world look and feel dark and bleak, and practically meaningless. You would be placing value upon valueless things, using energy towards things that deserve no attention, and living a life in a way that is not living.

Though these concepts and ideas can be open to interpretation, and are very subjective to each perspective, these are simply my own views. I am sure that there will be people who disagree with what I have wrote, and I am fine with that. All I was trying to do is to make people think: "Am I happy? If not, then why?" -- I ask myself this from time to time. This allows me to step away from my life, and maintain a clear perspective on where I am going. It is too easy to get caught up in your daily and forget about your own happiness.

Hope you enjoyed reading this, and maybe took away something helpful.

Peace and love,
-Daryl Simons Jr.

Firstly, I should state why I am writing about this topic. I was just sitting here scrolling through Facebook, and then I did it again, and again, and again, assuming that I was going to find something "new" on here. What is it about Facebook that was turning me into a mindless zombie, just wasting countless hours on old or pointless news -- I wouldn't even call it news, updates maybe. But is it about Facebook that does this to me, or is it even Facebook that is the reason for this allure? I have a few ideas, but I would like to develop these ideas, and reveal them as I discuss this question.

As human beings, we like to socialize (generally), even the people who don't go out and socialize probably like social attention as well. With that said, we like to know what is going on, and the sense of belonging. Facebook, to an extent, does provide some level of this. Though we are not with people physically through Facebook, we do get an idea of what is going on around you. But, the difference about Facebook over a real world interaction is that you can interact with so many more people in a shorter amount of time on Facebook than you ever could in the real world; thus, exponentially increasing the "buzz" created from the socialization. I would compare it to the consumption of alcohol. Either you can sip and relax on a low alcoholic beverage, with little to moderate effect from the alcohol, versus binge drinking in which you feel the effects quickly and strongly. This conveniently leads to my next point, the social hangover.

Social media in general has vastly overstimulated our socializing receptors (e.g. the excitement that we get from socializing). We feel like we always need to be connected, to know what everyone is doing. If we do not, we almost feel empty and alone, and for some, depressed. I feel a lot of these symptoms from time to time. Certainly, social over-stimulation and the withdrawals aren't the only things drawing us back to Facebook, the societal pressures to be on social media, and to always stay up-to-date has certainly played a factor as well. But is this suggesting that people today are any different than they were 10, 20, 50, 100, or 1000 years ago?

Fundamentally, I doubt it, at least not socially different.We crave interaction with others. We love receiving positive feedback from people. We savor the bonds that we have with one another --> we need bonds to survive emotionally. Humans are meant to social, we are social creatures. Facebook just fills this need, "gives us our fix" per se, but at a much higher level than humans throughout history ever have. Like any substance, Facebook needs to be used responsibly. It should not become a substitute for real world interactions. Facebook cannot simulate the benefits created from physical touch and from being around others; the sights, sounds, and even smells during actual interactions. If a baby is not held that much as a young infant, he/or she will develop emotional issues as they get older. Why would this be any different for when this baby becomes a young child up to an adult? (Besides the difference in physical interaction, you aren't going to or are expected ever hold a full grown human on a regular basis!)

Lastly, before addressing this question, I have one more point --> the habitual aspect of Facebook, getting in a habit of constantly checking Facebook. I have caught myself checking Facebook when I didn't even realize that I was checking Facebook, I was just doing it; it was almost as habitual as breathing had become. This notion can certainly help explain why Facebook may seem so addicting, since we check Facebook so often; is it because we have a craving to do it, or is it just a casual reaction to do it?

So why is Facebook so addicting, aka, why am I so addicted to it? Maybe it's because I am human and crave the social experience. Or maybe it's just because I am bored and have nothing else to do; this excuse is horseshit in this day and age by the way.

As a side note, I have experimented with this notion on a couple different occasions in which I went without using Facebook for a week straight (sounds sooooo horrible, right?). Well I noticed a couple things. The first time I did this little experiment, the first couple days were kind of difficult, but I usually found something else to occupy my time, like read a book, or watch TV, or even do homework. This led me to an idea that I was just using Facebook as something to do, like a hobby. Except with Facebook is that any real productivity is virtually non-existent when using Facebook. At least when reading a book, or playing piano, or doing homework, these activities are relatively productive (especially homework). Facebook... not at all, unless you are using it for networking purposes for you career, or some group promoting a cause (or something of this nature).

The second time I did it, I ended up substituting Facebook with another socializing alternative (online as well). So this test led me in another direction. Instead of simply finding something else to do, I found something to fulfill my social needs (these needs that were being fed previously by Facebook).

Both of these tests have at least suggested that it was not just Facebook that was making me addicted to Facebook, it could have been for a number of reasons. The "social experience" first and foremost probably being the biggest reason, but this was alongside of the habitual notion of Facebook acting as simply something to. The social reason is a harder one to address in certain situations because we do not always have access to other people, or more so, the people we want to socialize with, so using Facebook in those situations isn't that bad, and I would argue that it can be a good thing in those instances (lack of social experiences can be detrimental to an individual, so something is certainly better than nothing).

The other reason I suggested, the reason of using Facebook because it is something to do, should be encouraging to those who want to break their Facebook addiction! You know what the solution is? Find something else to do!!! It's quite simple, really. You just back away from your computer, or phone, or whatever the means you are using to access Facebook, and you find something else to take up your time... It becomes easier the longer you do this.

I can't really think of any more to write about on this topic, but if I do, I will certainly write more about it in the future.

Hope you could take something out of my thoughts after reading this (if you managed to finish it all, haha). If I can suggest any piece of advice, in regards to socializing, is this; you don't have to be socializing all of the time, it is okay to be alone once in a while. Learn to be happy by yourself, and then every experience you have from then on out will be so much more rewarding!

Peace and Love,
-Daryl Simons Jr.

Good time to vent... I think that I am starting to figure some things out. Happiness, for example, is based primarily on our own perceptions of reality. How we perceive everyday actions and behaviors, including our own, seemingly has a big impact upon our mood. Lets say, for this instance, that if I am paranoid about my friends and the people I love, in regards to trust, it would be difficult for me to live a happy life. I'd always feel as if someone was going behind my back...

Friendship. That's a fun topic to talk about. Friends certainly come and go. People live and move on. Things change. That is simply a common theme in life. Friendship, I would argue, is sometimes harder to maintain than a romantic relationship. The dynamics are just different. You aren't friends, or good friends, with someone because you are attracted to them, or always that you share the same interests, or because you want to be with them all the time. Good friends, like good romantic relationships, are however you make them out to be.A sense of balance and peace is difficult to achieve, and even more difficult to maintain.

Though I am still in the process of figuring out how to do this myself, I believe that the answer lies within yourself. The ability to be comfortable with yourself, and to be loving and trusting. When this is achieved, maintaining healthy relationships become alooooootttt easier, I would have to imagine.... A sense of balance and peace should equal some level of happiness as well.Someday, we all have to make decisions that will take us one way or another in life. Not just in terms of career direction, but the direction of our selves, what kind of person are we building up to be.

Every action, every person we meet, everything that happens in your life adds another small piece to your ever accumulating self. It's like the idea of the butterfly effect, one small action can cause a ripple effect in the future; though it is very well possible that we never find out what that eventual effect was. Maybe a simple pat on the head of a small child could mean the difference between becoming a juvenile delinquent to being a future honors student in college. That could seem out there... but the possibilities are endless.

Our reality... What do we value, and why? Why is our culture so obsessed with obtaining and worshiping money? Is it the objects that we want; the materials? Are the materials supposed to make us happy? Why are we so unhappy then? We really need to take a look at ourselves, at our loved ones, to those around us, and to those around the world. We need to recreate our perspective on life, especially when we are sweating the little things. We need to realize that we are all in this existence together. To think that sooooo many people seem to be "okay" with letting billions of people starve around the world just so they can live their comfortable little lives... this scares me.

I'm fine with not having much, but I realize that the little that I have, the little that I am content with and appreciate greatly, is still far more than probably what 80% of the worlds population doesn't have. I feel like I will take this mentality with me as I age, and won't become materialistic-zombie. Hopefully, instead, I can use whatever I make to do something good in the world. Call me naive. Call me idealistic. Call me a dreamer. Nothing spectacular is ever done without someone dreaming about it...

Peace and love,
-Daryl Simons Jr.

One thing that I have begun to learn is that life can go in any direction at any given time. The unpredictability that exists in life is the thing I look forward to the most. I like being uncertain in that regard. The uncertainty is what keeps me looking for the answers in life, though most answers will never be found. I will keep moving forward in this journey called life. My ultimate goal in life will eventually present itself to me, but in the meantime, I will continue enjoying what I have right now.

You will meet people throughout this journey. Many will become friends you may have temporarily, while a few could become friends you will have for the remainder of your life. The latter people will stick with you thick and thin. They won't turn on you even in the tempting-est of situations. Though this sounds depressing in a sense, it allows one to distinguish who their true friends are. They will help you through this journey, as well as helping you enjoy it.

All that life has to offer is not only found within yourself, but all around you in others...

Love will be found, fun will be had, and happiness will follow. Mistakes will be made, things will change, and people will be hurt.

But life goes on, learn from experiences you have had, and move on...